Seek to Understand, to Belong
by Eevee Tofu
Summary: Because even the new kid has feelings. Sucky summary ftw. I promise the story is better. MxM, kind of typical high school AU. Blah.


Yay. Me again. I got this idea while... um... Actually, I don't know. Just read it, okay?

Matt x Mello. Yeah. Again. High school AU. Kinda stupid. But hey. If you like it, tell me.

* * *

**(Matt)**

_I'm not gonna cry,_ I tell myself as I walk through the doors into an unfamiliar school. _NOT going to cry. Totally not gonna._

It's the middle of my junior year, and this is the umpteenth time my family has moved. Every single time before, I've broken down and cried on my first day, which has always been in the middle of a term. My parents don't care. My father thinks it's pathetic, and that I need to suck it up and act more like a man. And my mother's too wasted to give a shit.

So here I stand in the lobby of Stone Forest High School, which, if you ask me, is a stupid name. I take in a deep breath and stride boldly where no me has gone before.

After meeting with the counselor and obtaining my schedule, the bell rings, signaling the start of third period. I find my class and sit timidly in the back of the room, hoping no one will pay any attention to me. Most of the other students barely even glance at me. Until _he_ shows up, blond and skinny and gorgeous, with a condescending sort of smirk on his lips.

"You're in my seat," he drawls, dropping his backpack with a sound like a sack of bricks hitting the floor. I feel a blush creep up my neck and into my cheeks.

"S-sorry," I mutter, leaning over to pick up my things so I can move. God, I'm a pushover for a pretty guy.

He scoffs. "If I told you to roll over and play dead, would you do that too?" he says, in a voice somewhere between a growl and a purr. "Go on." He tilts his head cockily, staring down his nose at me with piercing icy blue eyes. "Be a good puppy and sit up and beg."

Now I'm sure my face is bright red. I scurry off to a different seat, my metaphoric tail tucked between my legs. Some of the girls in the vicinity laugh cruelly, and the blond boy looks very self-satisfied.

FML, seriously.

As the day progresses, the news of my humiliation spreads like wildfire. People bark at me in the hallways, and do other mean things that make me feel like shit. Finally, in the five-minute break between sixth and seventh period, I go into the bathroom and lock myself in one of the stalls. The tardy bell rings, and the other boys clear out.

... And I start crying. Of fuckin' course. It figures. The one time I _promised_ myself I wouldn't cry, I sob like the weak little faggot I am. Stupid, stupid, stupid. If I believed in God, I'd ask Him to smite me where I sit. Which He would probably do anyway, since circles are straighter than I am.

The door's hinges squeal as someone pushes it open. I quell my sobs to quiet whimpers, not wanting to advertise my presence. He (whoever he is) relieves himself and washes his hands. I accidentally let slip a sob-hiccup. And the feet move closer. Oh god dammit.

**(Mello)**

I actually feel kind of horrible, for once. I do have a habit of fucking with new kids, but I've been in a bad mood all day and I think I crossed the line. Poor kid. He was so _cute,_ too. If I run into him again, and no one else is around, I should apologize. And for the record, I do _not_ apologize. To ANYONE. Unless it's REALLY fucking important.

And well... this is important. Shut up.

French class is boring. Let's hang out in the bathroom! I get there and empty my bladder, just in case someone decides to subject me to a polygraph. Then someone sniffles. Well, it's more of a whimper. A puppyish whimper. Reminds me of Matt.

... Yes, I remembered. You would too.

His name escapes my lips before I can stop it. He gasps a little, then whispers, "yeah...?" A wet sniff echoes in the tiles. "Who's that?"

I choke. "You remember the asshole from Algebra?" Shit. I feel horrible. Absolutely horrible.

"What d'you want?" he sniffles bitterly.

I bite my lip. "I... Look, I... This is a really bad excuse, but I was in a really foul mood this morning, and I... yeah. I fucked up. I'm... sorry. I shouldn't have taken it out on you."

"You can yell at me," he says softly. "I'm used to it."

Oh...

"I'm sorry," I say again, once my voice finds its way out. Does he live in a bad family? Do people just hate him for no reason? How could anyone hate _him_? "Really, I am. I'm not a mean person, I'm just..."

"No one gets you."

...

Holy shit. This kid _understands_.

"We're friends, okay?" I decide all of a sudden.

"What? Why?" he asks incredulously. And I can tell he means, _Why would you want to be __**my**__ friend?_

Uh... _Because you're adorable and I think I'm totally attracted to you._ No, that's too creepy. Instead, "You need someone on your side."

He's quiet, after one sniffle. His shoes squeak as he gets up and walks over to the stall door, and opens it. His eyes are a dark sapphire; deep, deep blue, beautiful, filled to the brim with emotion, reddened by tears. If I didn't have the self control that I have, I'd swoon right here on the spot. But I manage to keep my composure. Somehow. Except my damn hand, which moves of its own accord to brush the tears from his cheeks. A flush rises in his face, his eyes widen, and I jerk away suddenly. "Sorry... Yeah, that was kinda weird, sorry..."

"No, it just..." He lifts his own hand to touch his cheek where I just did. "It... just surprised me, is all..."

Thank you, long hair, for covering my ears, which glow crimson instead of my cheeks. "So... you... you don't mind?" I stutter. My hand floats back up to his face, and he seems to lean in to meet it.

"Uh uh," he murmurs, almost purrs, his eyelids fluttering heavily, like a cat enjoying a caress along its spine. I place my other hand on the opposite side of his face, cradling it. His skin is so soft. I love it.

Suddenly he starts to cry again, then lunges forward and wraps his arms around me. Instinct tells me to embrace him. He sobs gently, more hiccuping than anything, shivering a little. I run my hand slowly up and down his back, wanting to comfort him. He relaxes. He trusts me. And all of a sudden, he says something that makes me feel... this warmth I've never felt before.

"Thank you... Thank you so much." He moves his head to adjust to the embrace, and his lips touch my neck for a brief moment. I think nothing of it, until I realize there's faint moisture where that contact occurred.

He... _kissed_ me. ... Did he? I place an almost-kiss on his neck, just below his jaw. I have to know whether that was purposeful. For a moment I fear the worst when he shivers, but then he touches his lips to my cheek. You can't misinterpret that. You just _can't_. I turn my head, and our noses touch.

There's this unseeable force keeping my lips from touching his, like a magnetic field between two magnets of the same pole. North to North. The closer I try to get to him, the thicker the air feels, an impenetrable cushion. I can taste his breath, and it's delicious. Finally, one of us (I'm not sure who) turns South, and we come together, breaking the spell.

Of course I've kissed before, but... never like this.

"I think I love you," I whisper. "Does that make me crazy?"

"Maybe." I feel him smile. "But if so... that would make _me_ crazy, too."

* * *

YAY END.

This story is written with like... no forethought whatsoever. I write it as I think of it. This will explain why later chapters have random shit in them that make no sense. Other DN characters will appear, by the way, but I'm not planning to make them a huge part of plot. (As soon as plot wants to start developing.)

So... yeah. There will be more. Review if you enjoyed.


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